The Peril of Marrying the Wrong Husband

There is an old Chinese saying that goes “A man’s greatest fear is establishing a career in the wrong industry while a woman’s greatest fear is choosing the wrong husband to entrust her life with”. This age old saying certainly still holds true in today’s modern society. In a recent UFM 100.3 radio programme, one of the interesting topics was the proliferation of dating agencies in Singapore due to the rising singles above 40 years old.

Inevitably, we will all grow old and die one day, but nobody will relish the prospect of dying alone. It is terrible to imagine that in your final days, you have no one to take care of you and provide the emotional support. Your friends, siblings and parents will not be together with you for the rest of your life journey. Only your partner and children will. So the important goal in our lives should be to find the right partner to grow old with. Given that life is a long journey, wouldn’t it be better to share the joy. bitter and sad moments with someone?

In the radio programme, one of the female Singapore listeners claimed that she would give herself until 50 year old to find a mate and set up a family. Beyond that, she would stop trying to find her true love. My thoughts is that by that age, it would be very difficult to find her soul mate. After all, most Singaporean males would prefer ladies who are much younger than them. And even if she does indeed found one, at that age, it is difficult to conceive and have children. By setting such an unrealistic goal, she is shooting herself in the foot.

I suppose that when we are young, we tend to take time for granted. But most will soon realize that time is a cruel machine and before we knew it, our prime time would have faded away with the wind. The bottom line is: don’t look back in regrets and always seize the moment. Life is imperfect and everyone has their flaws and strengths. In this regard, you can spend a lifetime looking for the “perfect one” but you will never really find him because such person is non-existent.

While single ladies should make it a priority to find the right partner, this does not mean they should get married for the sake of being married. I have seen many cases of irresponsible husbands who inflicted much suffering to their families that it would have been better off that the man and woman did not get married in the first place. In fact, this was the case for one of my university buddy’s parents. His father struck lottery twice and won a lot of monies. But he gambled all the monies away and became jobless for many years. As a result, my friend’s mother had to take on many jobs to support the family.

The key thing for a single lady wishing to find her Mr Right is to have realistic goals and to moderate expectations. Good men are hard to come by and it will be foolish to expect marrying a young, handsome and financially stable guy. Be pragmatic and look out for someone who is down-to-earth and has a career to speak of. By the time you are in your 40s, it will be too late to press the panic button.

Magically yours,

SG Wealth Builder